Chapter 5: Here Come's A New Challenger!
SirBearington
Well-known member
Here Comes A New Challenger!
Magsnik held the rabid squig as it snapped at him with those razor sharp chompers it had for a mouth. He hummed as he held it up against another fatter and far more docile squig which happily sat on the palm of his hands with a stupid smile and happy grin stretched across its face. He huffed as he found that the rabid squig was not only extremely aggressive but it was also leaner and smaller than his baseline squig.
“One more into the pile.” He grumbled as he gently placed the docile squig down before grabbing the hostile squig by the jaw. He grimaced at the feeling of the creature's sharp teeth poking at his skin but ignored it as he pulled down and folded the creature on its back. There was a sickening snap and pop before the creature stopped its struggle. He then tossed the limp thing in his pile of rejects.
He shifted on his seat as he grabbed another squig from the cramped cage he had holding all the ones he had and inspected it. This time around, it possessed something that made it stand out from the rest of the herd. He lifted it up and saw the small secondary pair of legs. “You’re definitely a keeper!” He chuckled out before leaning away just as the thing snapped at his face, “Into the pens you go!” He then shouted as he tossed the creature inside the newly built pigsty where it wallowed on the mud along with the rest of the squigs he saved from the cull.
It was a whole assortment of squigs inside the large pigsty he’d built away from his house. It was large enough that he could use it as a mud wrestling pit if he so chose, but he’d rather not consider what had mixed in with the mud. Still, with the squigs far away from his home, he didn’t have to deal with all the snarling and snorting. With the new pigsty, he had to sort out and pick the squig’s worth a damn, “You’re a hairy one ain’t ya?” He remarked as he held up another squig which could only be described as covered with short fuzzy hair.
Despite the importance of his current work, he still had some other errands he needed to get too and Beel was all too happy to remind him, “Hey Magi, what’s taking you so long?” The daemon called out to him, making him pause from his work as he turned to the woman waving at the fence gate, “The girls already have the smoker ready and the pit’s piping hot. Those demonic steaks aren’t cooking themselves you know and I’m starving!” She yelled out, urging him to hurry up.
“Just doing some last minute squig breeding.” He replied as he tossed the hairy squig into the pen. The cage he had crammed full of squigs was already close to empty so it wouldn't take much longer, he wagered, “This would have been way easier and less time consuming if I had a runtherd around,” He grumbled out as he inspected the next squig but found that it only wanted to bite his fingers off.
“All I’m seeing is you killing a whole lot of them. What’s the point of making a large pen for them if you’re going to kill them all?” Beel complained as she hopped right in and headed straight towards him. Before he could even respond, she plopped herself right atop his lap. His eyes twitched as he gazed down on the girl who just smirked at him as she squirmed a bit to settle in her new found seat. He bit back a curse as he sighed out and went back to his work.
“I’m definitely killing off a whole lot of them, but not everyone. I’m doing my best to prevent these rejects from shedding spores, just killing them so we can roast them and cook them later on,” He explained as he broke another squig’s back. The pile he had made was quite large, but not big enough that the canvas he had underneath the pile wouldn’t be big enough that he couldn't tie them all up.
“Well why didn’t you say so! Still, what does killing have to do with Squig breeding?” She asked while she gazed at the pile with barely contained hunger. He bopped her on the top of her head to remind her why she shouldn’t eat them raw.
“Beel, if all that’s left are squigs with useful traits, which squigs do you think would appear more often?” He questioned her leadingly, letting her know why he was initiating a cull on his herd of squigs.
“The squigs you haven’t killed off?” Beel replied with a frown as she trailed off while she glanced over to the survivors.
“Yeah, that’s the thing about squigs. Sure you can have a shit ton of them around but all those spores would leave you with a jumbled mess of a herd like what I have right now.” He gestured towards the pen before he further elaborated on, “Since they reproduce via spores, the only way I can control which ones pop up is killing off the ones I don't like. Eventually, I’m going to get a population of squigs with the desirable traits.”
“Ohhh, now I get it.” The woman snapped her fingers as she finally got why he was killing off a large portion of his herd. He nodded as he gave her a pat on the head for that. She preened at the attention he gave her as she smiled and blushed before she turned up to him.
“You know, I thought there’d be a whole lot more biting involved,~” She then said, which earned a cuff on the back of the head. The woman pouted as he rolled his eyes at him.
“You know exactly why,” He muttered out as he went back to his grizzly task. With the girls rumbling stomach and whines spurring him on, he managed to finish the cull without a hitch. His herd had thinned considerably but what he was left with was a good stock of squigs that should hopefully shed spores that would drown out the spores of the old stock.
“Finally, I thought you’d never get done!” The daemoness exclaimed as she jumped off his lap, finally allowing him to relax once more.
Getting off his seat, he shook his legs to wake them up before tying up the small mountain of dead squig’s he was going to butcher. “Do you want the squigdogs or not?” he asked with an annoyed huff as he slung the bag over his shoulder.
“Barbecue! Barbecue~!” The girl cheered as she scampered off the pen and up towards his backyard where his former squig pen used to be. He huffed out and chuckled as he followed her as his stomach was rumbling now as well.
-x-x-x-
“Oh master, I hope you don’t mind but I’ve already started with the barbecue.” Emmy apologized as she manned the grill. It was more of a pit than anything else but he at least made sure it was bricked up and not just a hole in the ground. Currently, the girl was brushing some marinade over the leftover squig meat as the dark brown sauce dribbled down and sizzled over the charcoal. The savory scent of the bastardized soy sauce mixing in with the juices in the smoke made his stomach grumble.
“I appreciate it, Emmy. I was a bit preoccupied with the squigs so it’s a relief that I didn’t have to set things up.” He replied as he unslung his bag on top of a nearby table and untied the knot. There were a lot of carcasses that needed to be processed which should top up his larder for quite some time, “How’s the smoker going?” He then asked, wondering how that little project was going.
“While I admit that I’m a bit out of my depth here as this is the first time I’ve handled meat like this, it’s doing quite well.” Molly answered as she lifted up the hood of the makeshift smoker he made just for the occasion. He made sure that he only used the hulls of the ship around them when making it to avoid getting paint over the daemonic meat. The bloody ribs, center loin, shanks, and brisket of the Fleshhound made the smoke plenty fragrant and mouthwatering. Even after the crust had formed, it still looked plenty juicy. All in all, the smoker looked plenty demonic, especially with the green flame sizzling inside.
Prodding the meat with her fork, she then said, “The heat’s in the range that most meat would turn to briquettes but it’s cooking quite well. We wouldn’t have been able to reach such a temperature without the master’s green flame. It should be done in a few more hours. ”
“Good good, just keep it up and pull one out later so we can have a look. Hopefully, it doesn't dry out,” He praised her before reminding her to check on it.
“I’m sure the master would find that our grilling skills have yet to fail us,” The girl saluted as she closed back the lid before she prodded a sleeping Dirt for more charcoal. The gretchin grumbled as they went out to get more for the pit and the smoker.
“I’m looking forward to having a bite now,” He grinned out as he walked over to Emmy. He knelt down beside the pit and reached his hands in so that he could wash off the spit and dirt that had clung to his hands using the still hot ash. It stung a bit but he managed to rub off everything leaving his hands dusty but clean.
Dusting off his hands on his pants, he stood up before he asked her, “Emmy, I’ll handle the grill now. Mind if you butcher these for me?”. He gestured at the pile he laid out on the table which was in dire need of being processed into squigdogs.
“I would be delighted too, but I’m not too familiar with such creatures.” The girl admitted as she looked over the pile unsurely.
“That’s easy really. Just think of it as chicken but it has a really big mouth. Keep the intestines though, as I’ll need to use that for the sausages later.” He explained as he pulled out his favorite butchering knife and handed it to the girl. For her, it looked more like a proper sword than a knife but she handled it quite well as she held it in one hand.
“You can count on me!” Emmy saluted as she handed him the fork and brush she was using before she walked over the pile and started butchering. With the sword in deft hands, she hacked away at the squig, tearing them apart with practiced ease with a bright and sunny smile on her face. Even as she tore through squig corpse after squig corpse, not a single drop of blood spilled down on the group; trully, his butchering knife was the best knife one could ask for.
The girl did love that knife so maybe he should give it to her? He shook his head with an amused smile before he said, “I’d give you a pat on the head for being such a good girl if my hands weren’t so dirty,” He raised his dirty paws, showing off the dust covering his hands. While it was hygienic, as his hands were literally bathed in fire, it was still dirty and he’d rather not have his hand stain their hair.
“It’s fine, master. Your praise is plenty enough for us but… can I ask for a different reward this time?” She asked him as she gently placed the sword down before turning to him with a look of hope in her eyes. Her earnest stare had him buckling within seconds.
“Oh?” he whispered out as he raised a brow at her in curiosity. Molly and Emmy barely asked for anything so when they asked or something, he was all ears.
“... could you tuck me in later tonight instead master?” She asked him, making him pause as he was about to turn the skewer he had in hand. He turned to her and gave her his full attention as she demurely explained, “I’ve always wanted to know what it feels like to be tucked in my bed.” By the end of it, she was barely speaking above whisper and she sported quite the blush.
“Emmy, you know the master can be quite busy,” her companion warned her as he glanced at him with a hopeful look of her own. He snorted as he turned his attention back to the grill.
“You know what… I’ll tuck you in tonight and every night after this.” He answered and the girl immediately brightened up. Molly pouted as she looked away and Magsnik was quick to clarify, “I’m tucking you both in.”
“Thank you master!” Emmy thanked him with the brightest smile he had ever seen painted across her face before she practically launched herself at him. He was taken aback but feeling the girl's arms around his waist made his heart melt.
Molly, on the other hand turned, an interesting shade of red as she fiddled with hair while clutching on her apron, “T-there’s no need but if you insist,” She stammered out which had him chuckling. He truly was lucky to have these two angels serving him.
Magsnik groaned out as his little fun was interrupted by a little hellion who had slipped behind him and pressed up against his back. “Can I get tucked in tonight as well? I’ve been a good girl all week long,” Beel asked him, batting her eyelashes at him ever so innocent as she rubbed herself against him. Thankfully, Emmy pulled away leaving him with only one limpet to deal with.
“I’ll tuck you in if you stay in your own damn room,” He grumbled out as he kept his gaze at the pit. He took in a deep breath, pulling at what little dregs of energy he could master from deep within, before breathing out a stream of green fire down at the dying embers. He poked at the burning charcoal and spread them out to make sure that the heat was evenly spread out.
“But I like your bed better. It’s so large and fluffy that I feel like I’m sleeping on top of a cloud. It’s also so warm and inviting especially when you’re asleep,~” She moaned all too suggestively as she climbed up his back and wrapped her arms around his neck. He turned his gaze away from her as he watched Dirt haul back a sack filled with coal that dwarfed the tiny creature.
“God fucking damn it Beel. You have a room for a reason,” He grumbled out as he kept still while the daemon rubbed herself affectionately at him. He was feeling hot under the collar at the repeated assault as his ears now burned from the contact. She felt so soft against his shoulders and the scent of wilted flowers filled his lungs.
“You know, many would kill for a chance to have me in their bed.~ Am I not pretty enough for you? I can take on a more enticing shape, you know,” She whispered before she bit down and nibbled lightly on his ears. He seized up for a moment as heat rushed up his cheeks.
She had gotten more aggressive recently, teasing him at every moment and he just couldn’t take it anymore. He could feel what little sanity left he had slipping with every little game the daemoness decided to play with him. Taking in a deep breath, he finally snapped, “Fine! You wanna know why I can’t have you jumping in my bed everyday?” The woman looked at him wide eyed and startled but he barreled forward, giving her no chance to respond as he shouted, “It’s because you’re so damn pretty that it’s making it hard to think. I don’t know what I’d do if you keep jumping in my bed uninvited.”
At the end of his short tirade, his cheeks were a dark green yet he felt relieved having let it all out. She felt the girl's grip loosen before she let out a panicked squeak as she fell from his shoulder and landed on the ground. She looked up at him with a blush of her own, giving him a bit of satisfaction, as they stared at each other.
“H-how bold. To think that you’d fantasize about me like that.~ You truly are a brute,” She stuttered out with a shaky smile on her face even as she looked like a darn tomato. He could merely groan and threw up his arms in surrender.
“Stupid sexy fly,” He grumbled with a huff as he looked up at the rift only to frown as he saw it slowly turning red. He took a step back as the rift pulsed, growing and shifting as it the open portal roiled like a pot of boiling water.
“But I’m your sexy fly,” He heard her tease him as she felt his arms around his waist but his eyes were glued to the unstable looking rift about them, “I wouldn’t mind you having all those dirty lewd thoughts about me,~ In fact, I wouldn’t mind if you-” She whispered before he suddenly grabbed her and covered her with his body.
“Everyone! Take cover!” He shouted as he held Beel protectively with his arms just as an ear shattering explosion rocked his farm. For a brief second, he felt the ground actually wobbled as the portal spat something out straight at his farm. Whatever it was, it kicked up quite the dust cloud. Dirt’s scream trailed off as he was launched away by the blast before he heard glass breaking in the distance. He bit back a curse and turned his attention to where the thing landed.
“Fucking hell. What the hell…” He coughed out as he slowly got up while Beel clung to him. He could barely see anything in the dust cloud but with the help of Emmy’s and Molly’s eyes lighting up with flood lights, he could see a figure at the epicenter of the blast. He squinted as the dust cleared and the warning bells in his head started ringing.
There, climbing up the rim of the small crater they made was an armored figure clad in brass and blood colored steel. Heat sweltered of their lithe and slender form like an invisible fire as a feminine face gazed unseeingly towards with milky white eyes. Her fair skin was unmarked and perfect and the easy going smile showed her off as a beautiful shieldmaiden yet the scratches and pits in her armor told another story. In front of them was no ordinary daemon.
“Nice place you got here,” The girl greeted as she looked around with an appreciative nod.
The casual tone she spoke with raised Beel’s hackles as she pulled off him and stood at her full height. While she was smaller than he was, she towered over their two servants but even she was a bit shorter than the woman in front of them, and that wasn’t including the tucked in wings she had in her back.
“Who the hell are you supposed to be? Can’t you see this is private property,” Magsnik grunted out while Beel glared at the woman. Molly rolled up her sleeves while Emmy held her knife threateningly as they backed them up against this intruder. His hands clenched around the empty holster he used to hold his hammer and found that he had nothing.
The girls backed away with a hands up in surrender but still grinning at them as she replied, “Hey, it’s my first time in this plane and I have to say, the Warp is far bigger this side of the portal,” She looked at ease around them as her stance were relaxed and her weapon, a great sword strapped to her waist, having yet to be drawn,
Even with her mellow and mild mannered tone and nature, he did not feel at ease as he kept his eyes on her. His eyes tracking her hands as she held both hands behind her head. Beel spoke out for him as she warned the warrior, “If you value your life, Herald, I advise you to leave, now.”
The other girl chuckled as she unclasped her hands and rested her dominant hand atop the tiny skull pommel of her sword. The brass armored figure of the woman struck quite the imposing figure as her armor glinted under the red light of the portal as it bathed the land with its eerie glow, “Sorry princess, no can do, not when I have some business to attend to,” She apologized with a shrug before he felt her eyes settle on him. He squared up with his nose flaring and teeth barred as his hand balled up into fist.
“You dare?!” Beel growled out as she marched up to the woman but before they two could clash, he held her back. She looked back at him with confusion before he shook his head and gestured towards the farm. Whatever fight they might have will definitely destroy this farm and he did not want to start over.
“Beel, let me handle this,” He implored her and she reluctantly backed down. Turning his attention back at the woman, he asked her, “You smell of blood. Khornite I assume?” Even the smell of brimstone and burning metal couldn’t mask the scent of a battlefield hanging around her.
The girl's smile turned into a grin as she replied, “Right you are on that one good sir. At least someone’s being reasonable here,” The woman bowed lowly, almost mockingly but far more that of a warrior with a lot of swagger as she introduced herself, “Now where are my manners? Let me introduce myself. I am the Champion Maker, Lady Justice at your service.”
Magsnik huffed out and snorted as he acknowledged her introduction before he answered back, “I have many names but people from around here call me Magsnik. Now that we’re acquainted, I’d like to ask you to leave,” He gestured at the half finished gate he was making. It was almost complete but it lacked the sign telling people the name of his farm.
The girl stroked her chin as she hummed out in thought, “Hmm… let me think about it. Nope!” She stuck out her tongue as she tilted her head at him.
Magnsik sighed in frustration as he pinched the bridge of his nose before he questioned her, “What do you want, Justice? Can’t a retired warboss have some peace?” He kept his tone even while he tried reasoning with her.
“Retired? I wouldn't have known given how well you’ve barely looked out of shape and even with that small gut you have. The smell of fresh blood still clings to you, warboss, and not even a few days ago,” She pointed out with a knowing grin. He grimaced as he started to roll his shoulder.
“Funny coming from a blind woman,” He taunted her, as he straightened up. His hunch had gotten less prominent making him feel taller than when he had started the farm. His muscles might have shrunken but his skin no longer sagged. His frame was still leaner but he had substantially recovered. Still, he was unarmed while she had a huge fuck off sword.
“You’d find that I’m not as helpless as I appear,” She fired back as she started circling around them. Her eyes firmly on him as she dared him to strike while she still hadn't drawn her sword and had yet to strike but he held back as he kept facing her, refusing to let him see his back while also placing himself between his companions.
“Magsnik, never let your eyes off her. Not even once,” Beel warned her as she noticeably got more tense around her. He grunted as he glared at the shieldmaiden of Khorne.
“You really want a fight don’t you?” He asked her as he let out a frustrated huff.
“Hey, it’s not everyday that I get to fight an ork that’s wiser than most kings and smarter than most scholars,” The girl complimented him.
Magnsik bared his teeth as he growled back at her, “While I’m flattered, that ain’t changing the fact that you're on my property. Leave, now,” He warned her for the last time as Beel stepped forward, helping him emphasize his point.
“Now there’s the warrior that I came looking for,” Justice chuckled out as she grabbed on to her sword and crouched low. He made an attempt but he failed, now he just had to fight for not only his home and companions but also the peace he found in this valley.
DING!
All of them turned to Molly who blinked in surprise as she whipped around towards the smoker. “... Oh! The Barbecue’s ready! Let me just check if the meat's ready…” She excused herself awkwardly as all of them stared at her while she tended to their food. She pulled the lid open and lo and behold, a rack full of perfectly cooked meat ready for their consumption.
Molly hummed as she pulled one out from the rack and pulled a rib off. The bone practically slid off leaving them with the tender and still juicy looking meat. His empty stomach made itself known along with that of Beel’s and surprisingly that of Justice herself. He gazed at her with a bewildered look as the woman practically drooled at the scent of what they were cooking,
“Is that Fleshhound meat in your smoker?” She whispered out in awe and hunger as she shakily pointed at Molly who grabbed a nearby tray and started laying out the smoked barbecue while ignoring the previously explosive encounter they just had. Even Emmy backed down as she sheathed her knife and helped Molly by serving the trays at a dusty, but still intact picnic table.
“... Are you hungry?” He asked him as Beel looked at him and Justice in alarm. She immediately dashed forward and blocked the smoker from Justice’s line of light but the dishes were already laid out for all to see.
“H-hey! I’ve been climbing that rope for weeks! Give me a break here...” The girl stammered out as she looked a bit ashamed at the little show. Her confidence was shattered and now she was torn between looking at the food and gripping her sword tightly.
“Don’t you dare!” Beel shouted but Magsnik found a way out of the situation he found himself in.
“I swear if I find that clown, I’m going to wring that bastard’s neck,” He muttered out before he turned back towards Justice as he gestured at one of the empty seats they had around the table. “There’s plenty of seats to go around so sit down while me and my servants give you a plate. No funny business, alright?” He asked nicely, hoping she’d listened to him. The girl immediately let go of her sword as pressed her hands in front of her and bowed down low.
“I’ll be on my best behavior!” She assured him as she skipped towards a surprised Molly and asked her if she had a rag. The nandroid reluctantly pulled one out as the warrior maiden grabbed the cloth and started wiping the table of chairs free of dust and debris. It was a surprising sight, but a welcome one.
Beel sagged in defeat as she walked up to her. Dropping the act, she crossed her arm across her chest as she gazed at the surprisingly cheerful daemoness, “Magsnik, do you think this is wise? I don’t trust her…” She mumbled out.
“Neither do I, but the other option’s way bloodier and I don’t fancy my chances with her after I’ve shrunk down,” He admitted. He was retired, he didn’t have his WAAAGH anymore and what he had left was anemic compared to what once was. He only had party tricks and his meager strength to back him up.
“I’ll keep an eye on her,” She replied as he gave her a nod before going up to their unexpected guest to entertain her.
-x-x-x-
“By Khorne’s massive biceps, this has to be the best fleshhound I’ve ever tasted!” The Khornite shouted between mouthfuls as she chomped down on Orky houndsteak (patent pending). The toasted bread buns sandwich the pulled hellhound meat and topped with melted cheese was a sight to behold and he himself took a bite; he found it to his liking and found that he was craving not bloodlust and slaughter but more fleshhound meat to cook and incorporate in his dishes
Everyone settled down and now ate together, with Emmy and Molly getting a taste as well. Turned out, they could eat but it isn’t something they required, and they reassured him that a taste is all they needed. As for Dirt, he was a bit banged up but he was as happy as a pig in mud as he ate his meal.
“It still has the spicy and tangy flavor of fleshounds but the ork flame gives it quite the earthy tone and makes it even more savory! I’d recommend you as Khorne’s Pit Master but I’m kinda lost.” She gushed out before laughing out at the misfortune she had. He nodded as he swallowed the last bit of demonic meat and wiped his lips with his napkin.
“It’s not a problem,” He assured her as he glanced at Beel who was eating a whole steak all on her lonesome.
“Hey, mind if I crash in your place? I know I kinda challenged you and all but I can’t kill you now that I’ve tasted what you’ve cooked. I mean, man you cook a mean squig steak as well,“ She then asked him.
He blinked at her in surprise, “I don’t know. One daemon is already quite the handful,” He muttered out as Beel tore through the steak with gusto. She wasn’t leaving any crumbs in her plate as she used bread to wipe off any juices left
“Get your own ork warboss!” Beel shouted while she looked around while holding an empty cup.
Magnsik was about to drink some beer himself before he felt a hand slap his ass. His eyes twitched as he glared at Justice who grinned unapologetically, “I don’t know about that cupcake. He looks plenty big enough for two or maybe even four,” She replied as she waggled her eyebrows at him.
“Oh god, now there’s two of them,” Magsnik groaned out as he laid down his cup and covered his face, making Justice laugh out uproariously.
Wiping the tears off her eyes, she then offered, “How about this, in exchange for you giving me shelter and food, I’ll help you shape up along with whatever you need in the farm. You look like an Ork that could use some help getting back to shape,” She gave his shoulder a pat as she leaned close to him.
“What gave that away?” He asked sarcastically as he dragged his palm across his face.
“Hey, I appreciate the fact that you still want to be in shape. I’m just saying that you can certainly get back into shape faster if I help you around,” She answered before gesturing at some large flat boulders he used for exercise. “There’s also those heavy stones that don’t look like milling stones and they look like they’ve been moved a lot.”
He shook his head as he just nodded and relented to her offer, “Fuck it, what’s one more daemon on the farm? I still have plenty of room to spare so just find one that isn’t occupied and you're good.” His house was big, far too big for him.
“Magi!” Beel complained but he rolled his eyes at her. Justice actually asked him, which was plenty good enough in his eyes. Beel was lucky he really liked to have her around.
“Hah! I knew I liked you for a reason, Magsnik. Now, how about you crack that beer barrel open so we can have a real party?” Justice gestured at some of the newer batches he made that were just ready for consumption.
A grin spread across his face as he turned to his companion before he said, “Beel, why don’t you show her how things are done?”
Beel chortled as she smirked at Justice. “Oh honey, I’m not sure she can handle your brew,” She taunted her
Justice met her smirk with a first grin as she stood up and pointed at her. “Oh you’re fucking on! Barrel!” She challenged her and Magsnik laughed.
“You heard the woman.” He said as he looked towards the two gynoids and gestured towards the barrel of beer.
-x-x-x-
“Chug chug chug!” Dirt’s scratchy voice cheered as Justice tilted back her head while she downed a mug of beer. They had gone through a buttload of beer, practically emptying the entire barrel in their impromptu drinking competition. Both competitors looked sloshed and Justice powered through one more drink. Justice sat on one side while Beel sat on his lap.
She finished her mug and slammed it down before letting out a loud enough burp that would make even his rowdiest boyz back in Ullanor proud. She lifted out her hands in triumph as she cheered out, “Yeahhh!”
“D-don’t think I’m done just yet!” Beel slurred out as she raised her tankard for another but Emmy shook her head as she shook the barrel showing that it was empty.
“You're a tough cookie I’d tell you that, but I’m Justice! The most awesome of Khorne’s daemons!” Justice declared loudly before her face planted on the table. With the drinks running out and one barrel already nearly gone before he even planted a new batch of crops in his expanded farm, he placed his foot down.
“While your drinking contest is fun to watch, I’ll have to put a stop to it,” He stated.
“Awww but I was winning,~” Beel whined as she hiccupped before giggling.
“Nuh uh,” Justice fired back as she turned her head and gazed up at the Nurgling.
“Ah huh!” Beel petulantly answered back, making Justice snort out and laugh.
Straightening herself up even as she swayed a bit, she then said, “You know, this place is amazing. Great food, great companions, and some rivals I could try and beat,” She had a dopey smile on her face and looked out of it, but she was still lucid when she said that.
“Hah! You’re not bad yourself Khornite,” Beel laughed out before she fell face forward herself and started snoring loudly.
“Is she going to be ok?” Justice asked as she looked at the other daemon in concern but he waved it off.
“She’s fine. She just likes napping especially when she’s on my lap,” He explained as he gave the girl in his lap a pat on the head.
“I can see why she’s a handful,” Justice snickered out at them. The sight must have been ridiculous. He, a former warboss, had to babysit a greater daemon who was drunk as hell after said daemon claimed she was winning in a drinking contest.
“You don’t know half the story,” He chuckled out.
“Hey Magsnik, I’m really sorry for disturbing you. You’re a great guy even if you already laid down your weapon,” Justice apologized. Gone was a cocky grin she had nor the swagger she held herself. She just sat there as herself, smiling at him good naturedly.
“It’s fine. Hey, we drank and made peace and that’s enough of that,” He replied with a grin on his face. Let live and let go, as people would like to say in more peaceful times.
“If it's not too much to ask, why did you retire?” She prodded him curiously as she gazed at him with those eyes. They weren’t quite soul piercing, but they almost felt like it. As if seeing his discomfort, she grinned as she added, “Don’t worry. I really don’t look too hard at people. I let them surprise me as hey, what’s life without a little bit of the unknown?”
He took a sip from his still half filled cup before he answered her as truthfully as he could, “I gave up. There’s no winning in this galaxy so I might as well cut my losses and live my life as I wanted,” He sighed out, knowing full well that he had realized it far too late.
“Well, you’re certainly living quite the life,” Justice looked over to Beel with fondness and a bit of envy? Before he could continue with that line of thought, a small explosion rang in the wall at the back of his farm while the cheers and hoots of a small Orkish Warband could be heard from over the wall
“WAAAGH!”
“God fucking damn it,” Magsnik cursed out as he got off his feet and rushed off to the walls with Justice in tow. Climbing atop the small embankment that he could barely call fortification, he found himself face to face with half a dozen scrawny looking orks surrounded by a band of gretchins. The gretchin visibly paled at his presence but the Yoofs were undeterred as they jeered at him, though one of them visibly remained quiet and backed away slowly.
“Oy you! Yeah, you git!” the biggest one yelled. He looked just as big as Beel making him quite large, but he didn’t have the bulk of any one of the Boyz much less a proper Nob. He looked scrawny and gangly like an awkward dunkling, but he was the biggest and he acted like it.
“Fuck off. I don’t have time to play your games. Just come back tomorrow or something,” he shooed them away, not feeling like fighting today. He was in a good mood and he didn’t want to sour it.
“What? You scared? And here I thought I was facing an ork. Well, you look plenty big but that means squat when you’re a fucking coward!” The Yoof leader shouted while his band cheered.
“Fucking Yoof ruining my day. I’m done here,” He grumbled as he turned his back and walked down the wall so he could return to his chair and drink his beer in peace. He was going to just let them tire themselves out trying to scratch his fence if not for one particular taunt they made.
“Tell you what! If you come out here right now, I’ll make sure you die before I tear everyone in this farm limb from limb,” The yoof jeered and Magsnik immediately stopped dead on his track and turned around. He bee lined back over the wall while gritting his teeth in anger.
“Justice, mind if I borrow your sword?” he growled out as he clenched his fist in rage.
“Knock yourself out,” The woman grinned as she pulled out her sword for him and offered it. He grabbed the demonic sword and found it to be perfectly balanced and wickedly sharp. It hummed with contentment and curiosity as he gripped it tightly in his hands,
“Hah! I know you were a coward. Now get ready to face the wrath of-!” The yoof laughed out as Magsnik took in a deep breath before drowning out his voice.
“WAAAGH!” He bellowed out a loud and angry roar, letting his voice reverberate across the valley which had the ground shaking, before he leapt up in the air and launched himself at the boy. The yoof wouldn’t even be able to let out a scream as he cleaved him in twine.
He breathed heavily as he loomed over them as their precious leader fell down in two pieces. They flinched as they slowly backed away after he looked up at them. Raising his arms and spreading them out in challenge, he then roared out, “Now, anyone else who wants to take a shot?!”
“Run!” The cunning yoof from earlier shouted as he grabbed the nearest ork and made a break for it. Their little band screamed in terror as they ran away. Magsnik spat to the side in disgust as he climbed back up the wall with the help of an ecstatic and blushing Justice.
“That’s what I thought,” He sneered at the idiots behind them before waving for Justice to follow. She skipped along with him as they went back to their merriment.
And so, that’s how he ended up with another tenant and, he had to say, things almost went south but it was resolved before it exploded and now he had someone he could spar with. He was annoyed at how it started but he wasn’t complaining at how things developed. With an extra tenant, the need to start the next planting season early was now paramount, especially with the rift getting restless. He did not want to plant in his farm when the hulk was submerged in the warp.
A/N:
I'll keep this short and sweet cause I have a pounding headache from waking up to early due to my family's dog barking like crazy. New waifu get! Not only is she another hand in the farm but she's also a personal trainer that's here to whip Magsnik back into shape. He's going to have some major gains later on lol.
With that out of the way, I'd like to thank @Vyor for keeping me inspired as I really can't do ideas well if I don't have someone to soundboard it. I'd also want to thank my Patrons once again. You guys are the best! Consider dropping by my Patreon page and became a patron today to support me so I can keep on making these types of fics. It means a lot to me to keep on working on my fics. I also have also have a Ko-Fi page and a Subscribe Star for those who do not like Patreon.
Magsnik held the rabid squig as it snapped at him with those razor sharp chompers it had for a mouth. He hummed as he held it up against another fatter and far more docile squig which happily sat on the palm of his hands with a stupid smile and happy grin stretched across its face. He huffed as he found that the rabid squig was not only extremely aggressive but it was also leaner and smaller than his baseline squig.
“One more into the pile.” He grumbled as he gently placed the docile squig down before grabbing the hostile squig by the jaw. He grimaced at the feeling of the creature's sharp teeth poking at his skin but ignored it as he pulled down and folded the creature on its back. There was a sickening snap and pop before the creature stopped its struggle. He then tossed the limp thing in his pile of rejects.
He shifted on his seat as he grabbed another squig from the cramped cage he had holding all the ones he had and inspected it. This time around, it possessed something that made it stand out from the rest of the herd. He lifted it up and saw the small secondary pair of legs. “You’re definitely a keeper!” He chuckled out before leaning away just as the thing snapped at his face, “Into the pens you go!” He then shouted as he tossed the creature inside the newly built pigsty where it wallowed on the mud along with the rest of the squigs he saved from the cull.
It was a whole assortment of squigs inside the large pigsty he’d built away from his house. It was large enough that he could use it as a mud wrestling pit if he so chose, but he’d rather not consider what had mixed in with the mud. Still, with the squigs far away from his home, he didn’t have to deal with all the snarling and snorting. With the new pigsty, he had to sort out and pick the squig’s worth a damn, “You’re a hairy one ain’t ya?” He remarked as he held up another squig which could only be described as covered with short fuzzy hair.
Despite the importance of his current work, he still had some other errands he needed to get too and Beel was all too happy to remind him, “Hey Magi, what’s taking you so long?” The daemon called out to him, making him pause from his work as he turned to the woman waving at the fence gate, “The girls already have the smoker ready and the pit’s piping hot. Those demonic steaks aren’t cooking themselves you know and I’m starving!” She yelled out, urging him to hurry up.
“Just doing some last minute squig breeding.” He replied as he tossed the hairy squig into the pen. The cage he had crammed full of squigs was already close to empty so it wouldn't take much longer, he wagered, “This would have been way easier and less time consuming if I had a runtherd around,” He grumbled out as he inspected the next squig but found that it only wanted to bite his fingers off.
“All I’m seeing is you killing a whole lot of them. What’s the point of making a large pen for them if you’re going to kill them all?” Beel complained as she hopped right in and headed straight towards him. Before he could even respond, she plopped herself right atop his lap. His eyes twitched as he gazed down on the girl who just smirked at him as she squirmed a bit to settle in her new found seat. He bit back a curse as he sighed out and went back to his work.
“I’m definitely killing off a whole lot of them, but not everyone. I’m doing my best to prevent these rejects from shedding spores, just killing them so we can roast them and cook them later on,” He explained as he broke another squig’s back. The pile he had made was quite large, but not big enough that the canvas he had underneath the pile wouldn’t be big enough that he couldn't tie them all up.
“Well why didn’t you say so! Still, what does killing have to do with Squig breeding?” She asked while she gazed at the pile with barely contained hunger. He bopped her on the top of her head to remind her why she shouldn’t eat them raw.
“Beel, if all that’s left are squigs with useful traits, which squigs do you think would appear more often?” He questioned her leadingly, letting her know why he was initiating a cull on his herd of squigs.
“The squigs you haven’t killed off?” Beel replied with a frown as she trailed off while she glanced over to the survivors.
“Yeah, that’s the thing about squigs. Sure you can have a shit ton of them around but all those spores would leave you with a jumbled mess of a herd like what I have right now.” He gestured towards the pen before he further elaborated on, “Since they reproduce via spores, the only way I can control which ones pop up is killing off the ones I don't like. Eventually, I’m going to get a population of squigs with the desirable traits.”
“Ohhh, now I get it.” The woman snapped her fingers as she finally got why he was killing off a large portion of his herd. He nodded as he gave her a pat on the head for that. She preened at the attention he gave her as she smiled and blushed before she turned up to him.
“You know, I thought there’d be a whole lot more biting involved,~” She then said, which earned a cuff on the back of the head. The woman pouted as he rolled his eyes at him.
“You know exactly why,” He muttered out as he went back to his grizzly task. With the girls rumbling stomach and whines spurring him on, he managed to finish the cull without a hitch. His herd had thinned considerably but what he was left with was a good stock of squigs that should hopefully shed spores that would drown out the spores of the old stock.
“Finally, I thought you’d never get done!” The daemoness exclaimed as she jumped off his lap, finally allowing him to relax once more.
Getting off his seat, he shook his legs to wake them up before tying up the small mountain of dead squig’s he was going to butcher. “Do you want the squigdogs or not?” he asked with an annoyed huff as he slung the bag over his shoulder.
“Barbecue! Barbecue~!” The girl cheered as she scampered off the pen and up towards his backyard where his former squig pen used to be. He huffed out and chuckled as he followed her as his stomach was rumbling now as well.
-x-x-x-
“Oh master, I hope you don’t mind but I’ve already started with the barbecue.” Emmy apologized as she manned the grill. It was more of a pit than anything else but he at least made sure it was bricked up and not just a hole in the ground. Currently, the girl was brushing some marinade over the leftover squig meat as the dark brown sauce dribbled down and sizzled over the charcoal. The savory scent of the bastardized soy sauce mixing in with the juices in the smoke made his stomach grumble.
“I appreciate it, Emmy. I was a bit preoccupied with the squigs so it’s a relief that I didn’t have to set things up.” He replied as he unslung his bag on top of a nearby table and untied the knot. There were a lot of carcasses that needed to be processed which should top up his larder for quite some time, “How’s the smoker going?” He then asked, wondering how that little project was going.
“While I admit that I’m a bit out of my depth here as this is the first time I’ve handled meat like this, it’s doing quite well.” Molly answered as she lifted up the hood of the makeshift smoker he made just for the occasion. He made sure that he only used the hulls of the ship around them when making it to avoid getting paint over the daemonic meat. The bloody ribs, center loin, shanks, and brisket of the Fleshhound made the smoke plenty fragrant and mouthwatering. Even after the crust had formed, it still looked plenty juicy. All in all, the smoker looked plenty demonic, especially with the green flame sizzling inside.
Prodding the meat with her fork, she then said, “The heat’s in the range that most meat would turn to briquettes but it’s cooking quite well. We wouldn’t have been able to reach such a temperature without the master’s green flame. It should be done in a few more hours. ”
“Good good, just keep it up and pull one out later so we can have a look. Hopefully, it doesn't dry out,” He praised her before reminding her to check on it.
“I’m sure the master would find that our grilling skills have yet to fail us,” The girl saluted as she closed back the lid before she prodded a sleeping Dirt for more charcoal. The gretchin grumbled as they went out to get more for the pit and the smoker.
“I’m looking forward to having a bite now,” He grinned out as he walked over to Emmy. He knelt down beside the pit and reached his hands in so that he could wash off the spit and dirt that had clung to his hands using the still hot ash. It stung a bit but he managed to rub off everything leaving his hands dusty but clean.
Dusting off his hands on his pants, he stood up before he asked her, “Emmy, I’ll handle the grill now. Mind if you butcher these for me?”. He gestured at the pile he laid out on the table which was in dire need of being processed into squigdogs.
“I would be delighted too, but I’m not too familiar with such creatures.” The girl admitted as she looked over the pile unsurely.
“That’s easy really. Just think of it as chicken but it has a really big mouth. Keep the intestines though, as I’ll need to use that for the sausages later.” He explained as he pulled out his favorite butchering knife and handed it to the girl. For her, it looked more like a proper sword than a knife but she handled it quite well as she held it in one hand.
“You can count on me!” Emmy saluted as she handed him the fork and brush she was using before she walked over the pile and started butchering. With the sword in deft hands, she hacked away at the squig, tearing them apart with practiced ease with a bright and sunny smile on her face. Even as she tore through squig corpse after squig corpse, not a single drop of blood spilled down on the group; trully, his butchering knife was the best knife one could ask for.
The girl did love that knife so maybe he should give it to her? He shook his head with an amused smile before he said, “I’d give you a pat on the head for being such a good girl if my hands weren’t so dirty,” He raised his dirty paws, showing off the dust covering his hands. While it was hygienic, as his hands were literally bathed in fire, it was still dirty and he’d rather not have his hand stain their hair.
“It’s fine, master. Your praise is plenty enough for us but… can I ask for a different reward this time?” She asked him as she gently placed the sword down before turning to him with a look of hope in her eyes. Her earnest stare had him buckling within seconds.
“Oh?” he whispered out as he raised a brow at her in curiosity. Molly and Emmy barely asked for anything so when they asked or something, he was all ears.
“... could you tuck me in later tonight instead master?” She asked him, making him pause as he was about to turn the skewer he had in hand. He turned to her and gave her his full attention as she demurely explained, “I’ve always wanted to know what it feels like to be tucked in my bed.” By the end of it, she was barely speaking above whisper and she sported quite the blush.
“Emmy, you know the master can be quite busy,” her companion warned her as he glanced at him with a hopeful look of her own. He snorted as he turned his attention back to the grill.
“You know what… I’ll tuck you in tonight and every night after this.” He answered and the girl immediately brightened up. Molly pouted as she looked away and Magsnik was quick to clarify, “I’m tucking you both in.”
“Thank you master!” Emmy thanked him with the brightest smile he had ever seen painted across her face before she practically launched herself at him. He was taken aback but feeling the girl's arms around his waist made his heart melt.
Molly, on the other hand turned, an interesting shade of red as she fiddled with hair while clutching on her apron, “T-there’s no need but if you insist,” She stammered out which had him chuckling. He truly was lucky to have these two angels serving him.
Magsnik groaned out as his little fun was interrupted by a little hellion who had slipped behind him and pressed up against his back. “Can I get tucked in tonight as well? I’ve been a good girl all week long,” Beel asked him, batting her eyelashes at him ever so innocent as she rubbed herself against him. Thankfully, Emmy pulled away leaving him with only one limpet to deal with.
“I’ll tuck you in if you stay in your own damn room,” He grumbled out as he kept his gaze at the pit. He took in a deep breath, pulling at what little dregs of energy he could master from deep within, before breathing out a stream of green fire down at the dying embers. He poked at the burning charcoal and spread them out to make sure that the heat was evenly spread out.
“But I like your bed better. It’s so large and fluffy that I feel like I’m sleeping on top of a cloud. It’s also so warm and inviting especially when you’re asleep,~” She moaned all too suggestively as she climbed up his back and wrapped her arms around his neck. He turned his gaze away from her as he watched Dirt haul back a sack filled with coal that dwarfed the tiny creature.
“God fucking damn it Beel. You have a room for a reason,” He grumbled out as he kept still while the daemon rubbed herself affectionately at him. He was feeling hot under the collar at the repeated assault as his ears now burned from the contact. She felt so soft against his shoulders and the scent of wilted flowers filled his lungs.
“You know, many would kill for a chance to have me in their bed.~ Am I not pretty enough for you? I can take on a more enticing shape, you know,” She whispered before she bit down and nibbled lightly on his ears. He seized up for a moment as heat rushed up his cheeks.
She had gotten more aggressive recently, teasing him at every moment and he just couldn’t take it anymore. He could feel what little sanity left he had slipping with every little game the daemoness decided to play with him. Taking in a deep breath, he finally snapped, “Fine! You wanna know why I can’t have you jumping in my bed everyday?” The woman looked at him wide eyed and startled but he barreled forward, giving her no chance to respond as he shouted, “It’s because you’re so damn pretty that it’s making it hard to think. I don’t know what I’d do if you keep jumping in my bed uninvited.”
At the end of his short tirade, his cheeks were a dark green yet he felt relieved having let it all out. She felt the girl's grip loosen before she let out a panicked squeak as she fell from his shoulder and landed on the ground. She looked up at him with a blush of her own, giving him a bit of satisfaction, as they stared at each other.
“H-how bold. To think that you’d fantasize about me like that.~ You truly are a brute,” She stuttered out with a shaky smile on her face even as she looked like a darn tomato. He could merely groan and threw up his arms in surrender.
“Stupid sexy fly,” He grumbled with a huff as he looked up at the rift only to frown as he saw it slowly turning red. He took a step back as the rift pulsed, growing and shifting as it the open portal roiled like a pot of boiling water.
“But I’m your sexy fly,” He heard her tease him as she felt his arms around his waist but his eyes were glued to the unstable looking rift about them, “I wouldn’t mind you having all those dirty lewd thoughts about me,~ In fact, I wouldn’t mind if you-” She whispered before he suddenly grabbed her and covered her with his body.
“Everyone! Take cover!” He shouted as he held Beel protectively with his arms just as an ear shattering explosion rocked his farm. For a brief second, he felt the ground actually wobbled as the portal spat something out straight at his farm. Whatever it was, it kicked up quite the dust cloud. Dirt’s scream trailed off as he was launched away by the blast before he heard glass breaking in the distance. He bit back a curse and turned his attention to where the thing landed.
“Fucking hell. What the hell…” He coughed out as he slowly got up while Beel clung to him. He could barely see anything in the dust cloud but with the help of Emmy’s and Molly’s eyes lighting up with flood lights, he could see a figure at the epicenter of the blast. He squinted as the dust cleared and the warning bells in his head started ringing.
There, climbing up the rim of the small crater they made was an armored figure clad in brass and blood colored steel. Heat sweltered of their lithe and slender form like an invisible fire as a feminine face gazed unseeingly towards with milky white eyes. Her fair skin was unmarked and perfect and the easy going smile showed her off as a beautiful shieldmaiden yet the scratches and pits in her armor told another story. In front of them was no ordinary daemon.
“Nice place you got here,” The girl greeted as she looked around with an appreciative nod.
The casual tone she spoke with raised Beel’s hackles as she pulled off him and stood at her full height. While she was smaller than he was, she towered over their two servants but even she was a bit shorter than the woman in front of them, and that wasn’t including the tucked in wings she had in her back.
“Who the hell are you supposed to be? Can’t you see this is private property,” Magsnik grunted out while Beel glared at the woman. Molly rolled up her sleeves while Emmy held her knife threateningly as they backed them up against this intruder. His hands clenched around the empty holster he used to hold his hammer and found that he had nothing.
The girls backed away with a hands up in surrender but still grinning at them as she replied, “Hey, it’s my first time in this plane and I have to say, the Warp is far bigger this side of the portal,” She looked at ease around them as her stance were relaxed and her weapon, a great sword strapped to her waist, having yet to be drawn,
Even with her mellow and mild mannered tone and nature, he did not feel at ease as he kept his eyes on her. His eyes tracking her hands as she held both hands behind her head. Beel spoke out for him as she warned the warrior, “If you value your life, Herald, I advise you to leave, now.”
The other girl chuckled as she unclasped her hands and rested her dominant hand atop the tiny skull pommel of her sword. The brass armored figure of the woman struck quite the imposing figure as her armor glinted under the red light of the portal as it bathed the land with its eerie glow, “Sorry princess, no can do, not when I have some business to attend to,” She apologized with a shrug before he felt her eyes settle on him. He squared up with his nose flaring and teeth barred as his hand balled up into fist.
“You dare?!” Beel growled out as she marched up to the woman but before they two could clash, he held her back. She looked back at him with confusion before he shook his head and gestured towards the farm. Whatever fight they might have will definitely destroy this farm and he did not want to start over.
“Beel, let me handle this,” He implored her and she reluctantly backed down. Turning his attention back at the woman, he asked her, “You smell of blood. Khornite I assume?” Even the smell of brimstone and burning metal couldn’t mask the scent of a battlefield hanging around her.
The girl's smile turned into a grin as she replied, “Right you are on that one good sir. At least someone’s being reasonable here,” The woman bowed lowly, almost mockingly but far more that of a warrior with a lot of swagger as she introduced herself, “Now where are my manners? Let me introduce myself. I am the Champion Maker, Lady Justice at your service.”
Magsnik huffed out and snorted as he acknowledged her introduction before he answered back, “I have many names but people from around here call me Magsnik. Now that we’re acquainted, I’d like to ask you to leave,” He gestured at the half finished gate he was making. It was almost complete but it lacked the sign telling people the name of his farm.
The girl stroked her chin as she hummed out in thought, “Hmm… let me think about it. Nope!” She stuck out her tongue as she tilted her head at him.
Magnsik sighed in frustration as he pinched the bridge of his nose before he questioned her, “What do you want, Justice? Can’t a retired warboss have some peace?” He kept his tone even while he tried reasoning with her.
“Retired? I wouldn't have known given how well you’ve barely looked out of shape and even with that small gut you have. The smell of fresh blood still clings to you, warboss, and not even a few days ago,” She pointed out with a knowing grin. He grimaced as he started to roll his shoulder.
“Funny coming from a blind woman,” He taunted her, as he straightened up. His hunch had gotten less prominent making him feel taller than when he had started the farm. His muscles might have shrunken but his skin no longer sagged. His frame was still leaner but he had substantially recovered. Still, he was unarmed while she had a huge fuck off sword.
“You’d find that I’m not as helpless as I appear,” She fired back as she started circling around them. Her eyes firmly on him as she dared him to strike while she still hadn't drawn her sword and had yet to strike but he held back as he kept facing her, refusing to let him see his back while also placing himself between his companions.
“Magsnik, never let your eyes off her. Not even once,” Beel warned her as she noticeably got more tense around her. He grunted as he glared at the shieldmaiden of Khorne.
“You really want a fight don’t you?” He asked her as he let out a frustrated huff.
“Hey, it’s not everyday that I get to fight an ork that’s wiser than most kings and smarter than most scholars,” The girl complimented him.
Magnsik bared his teeth as he growled back at her, “While I’m flattered, that ain’t changing the fact that you're on my property. Leave, now,” He warned her for the last time as Beel stepped forward, helping him emphasize his point.
“Now there’s the warrior that I came looking for,” Justice chuckled out as she grabbed on to her sword and crouched low. He made an attempt but he failed, now he just had to fight for not only his home and companions but also the peace he found in this valley.
DING!
All of them turned to Molly who blinked in surprise as she whipped around towards the smoker. “... Oh! The Barbecue’s ready! Let me just check if the meat's ready…” She excused herself awkwardly as all of them stared at her while she tended to their food. She pulled the lid open and lo and behold, a rack full of perfectly cooked meat ready for their consumption.
Molly hummed as she pulled one out from the rack and pulled a rib off. The bone practically slid off leaving them with the tender and still juicy looking meat. His empty stomach made itself known along with that of Beel’s and surprisingly that of Justice herself. He gazed at her with a bewildered look as the woman practically drooled at the scent of what they were cooking,
“Is that Fleshhound meat in your smoker?” She whispered out in awe and hunger as she shakily pointed at Molly who grabbed a nearby tray and started laying out the smoked barbecue while ignoring the previously explosive encounter they just had. Even Emmy backed down as she sheathed her knife and helped Molly by serving the trays at a dusty, but still intact picnic table.
“... Are you hungry?” He asked him as Beel looked at him and Justice in alarm. She immediately dashed forward and blocked the smoker from Justice’s line of light but the dishes were already laid out for all to see.
“H-hey! I’ve been climbing that rope for weeks! Give me a break here...” The girl stammered out as she looked a bit ashamed at the little show. Her confidence was shattered and now she was torn between looking at the food and gripping her sword tightly.
“Don’t you dare!” Beel shouted but Magsnik found a way out of the situation he found himself in.
“I swear if I find that clown, I’m going to wring that bastard’s neck,” He muttered out before he turned back towards Justice as he gestured at one of the empty seats they had around the table. “There’s plenty of seats to go around so sit down while me and my servants give you a plate. No funny business, alright?” He asked nicely, hoping she’d listened to him. The girl immediately let go of her sword as pressed her hands in front of her and bowed down low.
“I’ll be on my best behavior!” She assured him as she skipped towards a surprised Molly and asked her if she had a rag. The nandroid reluctantly pulled one out as the warrior maiden grabbed the cloth and started wiping the table of chairs free of dust and debris. It was a surprising sight, but a welcome one.
Beel sagged in defeat as she walked up to her. Dropping the act, she crossed her arm across her chest as she gazed at the surprisingly cheerful daemoness, “Magsnik, do you think this is wise? I don’t trust her…” She mumbled out.
“Neither do I, but the other option’s way bloodier and I don’t fancy my chances with her after I’ve shrunk down,” He admitted. He was retired, he didn’t have his WAAAGH anymore and what he had left was anemic compared to what once was. He only had party tricks and his meager strength to back him up.
“I’ll keep an eye on her,” She replied as he gave her a nod before going up to their unexpected guest to entertain her.
-x-x-x-
“By Khorne’s massive biceps, this has to be the best fleshhound I’ve ever tasted!” The Khornite shouted between mouthfuls as she chomped down on Orky houndsteak (patent pending). The toasted bread buns sandwich the pulled hellhound meat and topped with melted cheese was a sight to behold and he himself took a bite; he found it to his liking and found that he was craving not bloodlust and slaughter but more fleshhound meat to cook and incorporate in his dishes
Everyone settled down and now ate together, with Emmy and Molly getting a taste as well. Turned out, they could eat but it isn’t something they required, and they reassured him that a taste is all they needed. As for Dirt, he was a bit banged up but he was as happy as a pig in mud as he ate his meal.
“It still has the spicy and tangy flavor of fleshounds but the ork flame gives it quite the earthy tone and makes it even more savory! I’d recommend you as Khorne’s Pit Master but I’m kinda lost.” She gushed out before laughing out at the misfortune she had. He nodded as he swallowed the last bit of demonic meat and wiped his lips with his napkin.
“It’s not a problem,” He assured her as he glanced at Beel who was eating a whole steak all on her lonesome.
“Hey, mind if I crash in your place? I know I kinda challenged you and all but I can’t kill you now that I’ve tasted what you’ve cooked. I mean, man you cook a mean squig steak as well,“ She then asked him.
He blinked at her in surprise, “I don’t know. One daemon is already quite the handful,” He muttered out as Beel tore through the steak with gusto. She wasn’t leaving any crumbs in her plate as she used bread to wipe off any juices left
“Get your own ork warboss!” Beel shouted while she looked around while holding an empty cup.
Magnsik was about to drink some beer himself before he felt a hand slap his ass. His eyes twitched as he glared at Justice who grinned unapologetically, “I don’t know about that cupcake. He looks plenty big enough for two or maybe even four,” She replied as she waggled her eyebrows at him.
“Oh god, now there’s two of them,” Magsnik groaned out as he laid down his cup and covered his face, making Justice laugh out uproariously.
Wiping the tears off her eyes, she then offered, “How about this, in exchange for you giving me shelter and food, I’ll help you shape up along with whatever you need in the farm. You look like an Ork that could use some help getting back to shape,” She gave his shoulder a pat as she leaned close to him.
“What gave that away?” He asked sarcastically as he dragged his palm across his face.
“Hey, I appreciate the fact that you still want to be in shape. I’m just saying that you can certainly get back into shape faster if I help you around,” She answered before gesturing at some large flat boulders he used for exercise. “There’s also those heavy stones that don’t look like milling stones and they look like they’ve been moved a lot.”
He shook his head as he just nodded and relented to her offer, “Fuck it, what’s one more daemon on the farm? I still have plenty of room to spare so just find one that isn’t occupied and you're good.” His house was big, far too big for him.
“Magi!” Beel complained but he rolled his eyes at her. Justice actually asked him, which was plenty good enough in his eyes. Beel was lucky he really liked to have her around.
“Hah! I knew I liked you for a reason, Magsnik. Now, how about you crack that beer barrel open so we can have a real party?” Justice gestured at some of the newer batches he made that were just ready for consumption.
A grin spread across his face as he turned to his companion before he said, “Beel, why don’t you show her how things are done?”
Beel chortled as she smirked at Justice. “Oh honey, I’m not sure she can handle your brew,” She taunted her
Justice met her smirk with a first grin as she stood up and pointed at her. “Oh you’re fucking on! Barrel!” She challenged her and Magsnik laughed.
“You heard the woman.” He said as he looked towards the two gynoids and gestured towards the barrel of beer.
-x-x-x-
“Chug chug chug!” Dirt’s scratchy voice cheered as Justice tilted back her head while she downed a mug of beer. They had gone through a buttload of beer, practically emptying the entire barrel in their impromptu drinking competition. Both competitors looked sloshed and Justice powered through one more drink. Justice sat on one side while Beel sat on his lap.
She finished her mug and slammed it down before letting out a loud enough burp that would make even his rowdiest boyz back in Ullanor proud. She lifted out her hands in triumph as she cheered out, “Yeahhh!”
“D-don’t think I’m done just yet!” Beel slurred out as she raised her tankard for another but Emmy shook her head as she shook the barrel showing that it was empty.
“You're a tough cookie I’d tell you that, but I’m Justice! The most awesome of Khorne’s daemons!” Justice declared loudly before her face planted on the table. With the drinks running out and one barrel already nearly gone before he even planted a new batch of crops in his expanded farm, he placed his foot down.
“While your drinking contest is fun to watch, I’ll have to put a stop to it,” He stated.
“Awww but I was winning,~” Beel whined as she hiccupped before giggling.
“Nuh uh,” Justice fired back as she turned her head and gazed up at the Nurgling.
“Ah huh!” Beel petulantly answered back, making Justice snort out and laugh.
Straightening herself up even as she swayed a bit, she then said, “You know, this place is amazing. Great food, great companions, and some rivals I could try and beat,” She had a dopey smile on her face and looked out of it, but she was still lucid when she said that.
“Hah! You’re not bad yourself Khornite,” Beel laughed out before she fell face forward herself and started snoring loudly.
“Is she going to be ok?” Justice asked as she looked at the other daemon in concern but he waved it off.
“She’s fine. She just likes napping especially when she’s on my lap,” He explained as he gave the girl in his lap a pat on the head.
“I can see why she’s a handful,” Justice snickered out at them. The sight must have been ridiculous. He, a former warboss, had to babysit a greater daemon who was drunk as hell after said daemon claimed she was winning in a drinking contest.
“You don’t know half the story,” He chuckled out.
“Hey Magsnik, I’m really sorry for disturbing you. You’re a great guy even if you already laid down your weapon,” Justice apologized. Gone was a cocky grin she had nor the swagger she held herself. She just sat there as herself, smiling at him good naturedly.
“It’s fine. Hey, we drank and made peace and that’s enough of that,” He replied with a grin on his face. Let live and let go, as people would like to say in more peaceful times.
“If it's not too much to ask, why did you retire?” She prodded him curiously as she gazed at him with those eyes. They weren’t quite soul piercing, but they almost felt like it. As if seeing his discomfort, she grinned as she added, “Don’t worry. I really don’t look too hard at people. I let them surprise me as hey, what’s life without a little bit of the unknown?”
He took a sip from his still half filled cup before he answered her as truthfully as he could, “I gave up. There’s no winning in this galaxy so I might as well cut my losses and live my life as I wanted,” He sighed out, knowing full well that he had realized it far too late.
“Well, you’re certainly living quite the life,” Justice looked over to Beel with fondness and a bit of envy? Before he could continue with that line of thought, a small explosion rang in the wall at the back of his farm while the cheers and hoots of a small Orkish Warband could be heard from over the wall
“WAAAGH!”
“God fucking damn it,” Magsnik cursed out as he got off his feet and rushed off to the walls with Justice in tow. Climbing atop the small embankment that he could barely call fortification, he found himself face to face with half a dozen scrawny looking orks surrounded by a band of gretchins. The gretchin visibly paled at his presence but the Yoofs were undeterred as they jeered at him, though one of them visibly remained quiet and backed away slowly.
“Oy you! Yeah, you git!” the biggest one yelled. He looked just as big as Beel making him quite large, but he didn’t have the bulk of any one of the Boyz much less a proper Nob. He looked scrawny and gangly like an awkward dunkling, but he was the biggest and he acted like it.
“Fuck off. I don’t have time to play your games. Just come back tomorrow or something,” he shooed them away, not feeling like fighting today. He was in a good mood and he didn’t want to sour it.
“What? You scared? And here I thought I was facing an ork. Well, you look plenty big but that means squat when you’re a fucking coward!” The Yoof leader shouted while his band cheered.
“Fucking Yoof ruining my day. I’m done here,” He grumbled as he turned his back and walked down the wall so he could return to his chair and drink his beer in peace. He was going to just let them tire themselves out trying to scratch his fence if not for one particular taunt they made.
“Tell you what! If you come out here right now, I’ll make sure you die before I tear everyone in this farm limb from limb,” The yoof jeered and Magsnik immediately stopped dead on his track and turned around. He bee lined back over the wall while gritting his teeth in anger.
“Justice, mind if I borrow your sword?” he growled out as he clenched his fist in rage.
“Knock yourself out,” The woman grinned as she pulled out her sword for him and offered it. He grabbed the demonic sword and found it to be perfectly balanced and wickedly sharp. It hummed with contentment and curiosity as he gripped it tightly in his hands,
“Hah! I know you were a coward. Now get ready to face the wrath of-!” The yoof laughed out as Magsnik took in a deep breath before drowning out his voice.
“WAAAGH!” He bellowed out a loud and angry roar, letting his voice reverberate across the valley which had the ground shaking, before he leapt up in the air and launched himself at the boy. The yoof wouldn’t even be able to let out a scream as he cleaved him in twine.
He breathed heavily as he loomed over them as their precious leader fell down in two pieces. They flinched as they slowly backed away after he looked up at them. Raising his arms and spreading them out in challenge, he then roared out, “Now, anyone else who wants to take a shot?!”
“Run!” The cunning yoof from earlier shouted as he grabbed the nearest ork and made a break for it. Their little band screamed in terror as they ran away. Magsnik spat to the side in disgust as he climbed back up the wall with the help of an ecstatic and blushing Justice.
“That’s what I thought,” He sneered at the idiots behind them before waving for Justice to follow. She skipped along with him as they went back to their merriment.
And so, that’s how he ended up with another tenant and, he had to say, things almost went south but it was resolved before it exploded and now he had someone he could spar with. He was annoyed at how it started but he wasn’t complaining at how things developed. With an extra tenant, the need to start the next planting season early was now paramount, especially with the rift getting restless. He did not want to plant in his farm when the hulk was submerged in the warp.
A/N:
I'll keep this short and sweet cause I have a pounding headache from waking up to early due to my family's dog barking like crazy. New waifu get! Not only is she another hand in the farm but she's also a personal trainer that's here to whip Magsnik back into shape. He's going to have some major gains later on lol.
With that out of the way, I'd like to thank @Vyor for keeping me inspired as I really can't do ideas well if I don't have someone to soundboard it. I'd also want to thank my Patrons once again. You guys are the best! Consider dropping by my Patreon page and became a patron today to support me so I can keep on making these types of fics. It means a lot to me to keep on working on my fics. I also have also have a Ko-Fi page and a Subscribe Star for those who do not like Patreon.
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