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A/N: Suffering from success, the short story. Chapter 19: The Samsara Hypothesis "-. July 24, 6 ANB .-" Shikaku led us out through a different passage than we came in, one that led to the surface right above us, which did turn out to be the Forest of Death. In fact, the tunnel opened into...

A/N: This is some real monkey business. I am peak comedy. Chapter 18: The Space-Time Conundrum "-. July 24, 6 ANB .-" 'Calm down' proved to be far too optimistic, and for once it wasn't Naruto's fault. The poor kid was curled up on the bunk bed with his face to the wall. The ground-level...

Unintended consequences are, unfortunately a thing. Poor timing is also a thing, especially when you're not firing on all cylinders. Timing is going to be terrible for everything a long time though. Chapter 17: The Hearsay of Eminent Distraction "-. Uchiha Itachi, Head of the Uchiha Clan...

"-. July 23, 6 ANB .-" "-. 10:34 PM .-" "-. Shikaku Nara, Jonin Commander of Konohagakure, Interim Commander-in-Chief .-" The chamber of the Konoha Barrier Team was not the best place for a debrief, especially when even Top Secret didn't feel confidential enough. But it was the chamber...

(II) And so it was that the first thing the Anami spirits experienced upon my return to life was euphoria. Oh Indra, will you one day ascend beyond this world and become my old Earth's Father Sky? Restart biological function, retrieve cognitive backups, assess archives viability, no...

A/N: Since people have expressed dislike for it, this is probably the last time I bother with 'technobabble.' Rejoice, I guess? Brace yourselves though, because this one is long. Chapter 15: The Meditation of Heaven and Earth (I) "-. ??? .-" "Dadyyy!" My daughter Yui tearfully...

A/N: This chapter and the next will either make or break the story. And its fanbase. Probably. But since this is Naruto, it was always going to happen. Chapter 14: The Abandon of Monsters "-. July 23, 6 ANB .-" C-catastrophic damage – susss-spend ex-ternal s-sensory innnn-p-put...

For reference. 🪱

Chapter 13: The Sword of Shinobi's Love "-. July 23, 6 ANB .-" "-. Uchiha Shisui, Konoha Anbu Ninja, Codename Crow .-" "When Heaven and Earth first appeared, three Spirits came about in the High Plains of Heaven." Shimura Danzo, in the end, ran away. "First was Amenominakanushi, the...

The ninja did do better, they didn't get themselves (fatally) immolated by friendly fire for one. Otherwise, at the risk of sounding terribly blunt, you explained your own misgivings here, I think. You were a kid. He's a man.

A/N: Do not fuck with the white mage. "-. Hyuuga Hiashi, Jonin of Konhagakure, Head of the Hyuuga Clan .-" "Nobody move or the Kyuubi brat gets it." I may have made a mistake. "I advise against whatever it is you're planning." Hyuuga Hiashi found himself in the unenviable position of...

A/N: Even disregarding the terrible writer's block that made me throw out everything I wrote for this part the first time, the process for writing this has been complex. Not as complex as the third and final section of this chapter, which was the real holdout. In a desert-dry irony kind of way...

Hiruzen didn't find out shit, he decided on this a while ago and chose today for the same reasons Danzo did. Orochimaru is currently distracted by the shiny.

Informational: Since a surprising number of people have asked, yes I do have Patreon and Subscribestar accounts. However, experience has taught me that I don't have the sort of relationship with my muse that lets me do the 'publish chapters ahead of time' thing on the regular. I certainly...

A/N: I finally watched The Last and I wish I didn't. In fact, I wish I didn't so much that I am seriously considering disregarding it completely, like Boruto. I don't know how Studio Pierrot managed it, but everything in that film except the idea of a populated Moon is inconsistent with the...

I'd completely forgotten about this, big thanks for mentioning it. Wouldn't want to let any plot holes slip by.

I'd imagine he can feel his insides on that level thanks to the Hashirama cells, so white zetsu wouldn't be able to do anything unnoticed. Black Zetsu fooled Madara into thinking he was his own spawn, comparatively, but he can't do the perfect henge like whites can The signal the anami are...

A/N: The plot always knows where you live. Chapter 10: The Ends of Holonomic Cognition “-. July 23, 6 ANB .-“ The Littlest Great War of 743 AS began with a border incident along the hastily drawn line between the Sovereignty of Pond and the Great Myrtle Nindocracy. Its first engagement was...

A/N: Turns out it was just over seven months until the party, not six like Hanzo said before. Hadn't looked up Sasuke's exact birth date at the time. Chapter 9: The Thoughts and Ruminations of Genii “-. Uchiha Itachi, July 23, 6 ANB .-“ “Gatekeeper.” The man turned in surprise. “Lord...

He sold some recipes to a few nearby locales so he had treats available, like the twister ice cream, but no, cookbooks have been way low on the priority list. It would be a pretty thin notebook too, since he only knows the traditional dishes and a few random stuff he recalls vaguely.