GooseActual
We go hard on Earth!
So I figured it would pretty cool to have a thread for the military folks to just hang out, tell stories and talk shit about the air force.
Non military members are welcome to ask questions or seek advice regarding future military service. Let me introduce my self.
Im Goose, I was a Parachute Rigger for the Marines for 6 years, got out as a Sergeant (Someone really goofed up there), I never deployed which is why I got the hell out, but I had some good times.
Now for a story, I posted this on SB a while back, but since im plagiarizing myself, I dont feel bad at all.
Marine Corps Ball 2015, after the ceremony me and the NCOs from my shop, including the gunny are in my room doing keg stands from the keg we definitely did not run with in front of every officer in the unit (wink wink), now after watching with great vigor after my 215 lb badass sergeant fell on his face doing a keg stand (coereced by chanting "little bitch" over and over mind you) I stepped outside of the room to make a call, as i walk out, the guest of honor, a one star general and commander of [something] is walking by, now drunk ass Cpl (at the time) Goose has a fuck it moment. "hey sir do you wanna do a keg stand"... he laughs at me, says no thank you, walks away, pauses, then comes back. "actually cpl, im not doing a keg stand, but i do want a fuckin beer" and so he walks in our gunny doing a keg stand, two sergeants having a chugging contest and two girls making out. I served him a beer (in a red solo cup of course) and he just stood there laughing his ass off... we had some small talk, but what stood out to me was as he watched this insanity unfold his words were "this is why i fuckin love marines, yall are some crazy mother fuckers"
A few hours (and many drinks) later, we had just returned from the club, and were finishing up the last of the beer [keg long since tapped out] and we see the general stumbling back in with his wife, again i ask "hey sir do you wanna beer" he looks and his wife and drunkenly says "please babe, ill be good I promise" she wasnt having it and said no, ive never seen a general look more like a sad puppy before.
you can command thousands of marines, but when your wife says its time to go to bed, you aint shit.
Question Time:
Iif you're airborne but didn't get blood wings, are you even airborne?
Can a Marine *not* draw a dick if handed a pen?
What is the STD rate on navy vessels?
Whats the best joke about the Air Force?
I hope this works out, I feel like these days the veteran community needs to be less toxic than the "angry facebook veteran" stereotype, so have fun!
Non military members are welcome to ask questions or seek advice regarding future military service. Let me introduce my self.
Im Goose, I was a Parachute Rigger for the Marines for 6 years, got out as a Sergeant (Someone really goofed up there), I never deployed which is why I got the hell out, but I had some good times.
Now for a story, I posted this on SB a while back, but since im plagiarizing myself, I dont feel bad at all.
Marine Corps Ball 2015, after the ceremony me and the NCOs from my shop, including the gunny are in my room doing keg stands from the keg we definitely did not run with in front of every officer in the unit (wink wink), now after watching with great vigor after my 215 lb badass sergeant fell on his face doing a keg stand (coereced by chanting "little bitch" over and over mind you) I stepped outside of the room to make a call, as i walk out, the guest of honor, a one star general and commander of [something] is walking by, now drunk ass Cpl (at the time) Goose has a fuck it moment. "hey sir do you wanna do a keg stand"... he laughs at me, says no thank you, walks away, pauses, then comes back. "actually cpl, im not doing a keg stand, but i do want a fuckin beer" and so he walks in our gunny doing a keg stand, two sergeants having a chugging contest and two girls making out. I served him a beer (in a red solo cup of course) and he just stood there laughing his ass off... we had some small talk, but what stood out to me was as he watched this insanity unfold his words were "this is why i fuckin love marines, yall are some crazy mother fuckers"
A few hours (and many drinks) later, we had just returned from the club, and were finishing up the last of the beer [keg long since tapped out] and we see the general stumbling back in with his wife, again i ask "hey sir do you wanna beer" he looks and his wife and drunkenly says "please babe, ill be good I promise" she wasnt having it and said no, ive never seen a general look more like a sad puppy before.
you can command thousands of marines, but when your wife says its time to go to bed, you aint shit.
Question Time:
Iif you're airborne but didn't get blood wings, are you even airborne?
Can a Marine *not* draw a dick if handed a pen?
What is the STD rate on navy vessels?
Whats the best joke about the Air Force?
I hope this works out, I feel like these days the veteran community needs to be less toxic than the "angry facebook veteran" stereotype, so have fun!